Reflections On My 30th Birthday
As I type this I just turned 30 years old and if you’re reading this and it’s still Sunday July 19 where you are, make sure you wish me a happy birthday 
.
I had a conversation leading up to my 30th birthday with a fellow 29 year old who was heading towards her 30th with a little trepidation. She had just divorced her husband, so needless to say she was experiencing significant changes in her life.
Personally I don’t look at 30 as a big deal, although there was one comment this particular girl made that caught my attention. She said as people turn 30 they usually are in one of two places – they have their “shit” together or they don’t. I told her I was about as happy as I could remember in my life as I turned 30, so her conclusion was I was one of those people who has their “shit together”. Yay for me.
It Was The Worst Of Times
It’s natural to reflect on your life as you get older, especially at milestone ages. If I look over my twenties I can certainly say it has been a wild ride, full of highs and lows.
I left my teenage years and entered my twenties while I was at university, not really enjoying my studies, not very motivated by much and just uncomfortable in my own skin.
The problem when your own self worth is low, is that you have great difficulty digging yourself out. You generally attract experiences to enhance your low self esteem because you view the world in “sad” glasses. Until you can switch the conversation going on inside your head from negative to positive, your experiences in the outside world will reflect this, further enhancing your negative belief structure.
In order to truly become confident, you need to have experiences that have a positive impact on you. There’s only so far re-framing your interpretation of events and thinking positive can take you, eventually you have to actually have the positive experiences to build your confidence.
As a result of my dogged determination to remain unhappy, I experienced many low-points. I’d have to say my time with panic attacks and anxiety during my early twenties was one of my least-favorite periods.
As always, thanks to the wonderful world of polarities that we exist in, the trauma caused by these experiences forced me to seek out answers to big questions. If I didn’t suffer the pain, I wouldn’t have gone looking for answers to certain questions either – you need the ying in order to see the contrast and thus fully experience the yang.
I won’t go into detail here, but if you want to read more about my experience with panic and the resultant search for happiness, you can read this –
During my early twenties I had a few part time jobs and experimented with different web projects. My most successful at this time was my Magic: The Gathering card game website, which I grew to the largest site of its kind in Australia and then later sold for $13,000, the first big website deal I made.
I also started my proofreading business BetterEdit.com in my early twenties, which I would invest serious time into growing, including trips to university campuses in Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Hawaii, Vancouver and Toronto to promote using posters.
From 20 to 25 years old I spent a lot of time playing with different projects and gained a lot of experience. I also began my study of Internet marketing during this time, and delved into more philosophical and spiritual studies too, as a means to figure out why the world is the way it is and what I could do to be happier in it.
I don’t look back on my first five years in my twenties as the most fun of times. Sure there were good times in there, but much of the experience was sabotaged by my attitude. I’m glad to have gone through that period for the growth it provided for me as a person, but I wouldn’t want to go back there again.
It Was The Best Of Times
A clear contrast to my first five years in my twenties, from 25 to 30 my life went from good to better to great, and thankfully, it’s still going!
It’s funny how as you get your “shit” together, people start to look at you as if you have answers to a question that has been bugging them for a long time – what to do with their life.
The answer to what to do with your life is simple – you need to experience. Your purpose is to gravitate towards activities that manifest joy for you, those around you and any person or living thing who is impacted by what you do. However, you won’t know what these things are by spending all your time wondering what to do.
Surrendering to the process of living is the only answer, but if you don’t at least commit to participating in the process, you don’t get anywhere.
I’ve read a lot of books that presented this wisdom as direct teachings from “god’s” mouth, or through the use of parables to explain ideas so you can more readily absorb them. Regardless of the source, reading about this is never enough, you need to BE it.
Creating awareness is definitely helpful, but until you experience the belief, it will remain only a truth as long as you have faith. If you really want to cement a concept you need to have lived it.
This is why the first five years of my twenties were so important. I needed to be lost in order to be capable of understanding what it feels like to find a purpose. The second five years were all about further refining and building upon the clarity I was discovering.
From 25 to today, the day after my 30th birthday, I achieved many milestones. I bought and sold websites, including selling my main business BetterEdit.com for six figures. I bought my first house, paid off the home loan within two years, traveled the world and just a few days before my 30th birthday, moved into a dream apartment in my ideal living location.
Most of this wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t conduct one crucial experiment – I started a blog. Although it seems strange to give so much credit to one event, I guess I really need to thank my friend Ed Chalmers, because it was him who first uttered the word “blog” and suggest I investigate it.
Starting a blog was just an experiment, but it led me to discover that I was capable of writing words that people wanted to read. It also allowed me to focus on activities that helped me to grow in so many ways.
I realized I could forge a specialty by combining my experience growing a blog and studies of Internet marketing. Becoming clear on my purpose as a blogger meant that I could devote more time to what I wanted to do, sell off what I wasn’t interested in, and build a lifestyle business, which was ultimately my main goal (the freedom to choose lifestyle over work or money).
During this time I further refined my attitude and it is this that I am most grateful for. Mindset is, and always will be, the key to everything.
As humans we have freewill, which means we have the power to make the ultimate decision – how we perceive every moment and every event in our life. If you truly understand this, then nothing in your life can impact you in a way that you don’t want it to.
Living this idea is harder than stating it, but during the last five years I’ve become a lot better at it. Just as my “ugly and sad” glasses made me think in negatives, see negatives and thus experience negatives in my life, by changing the colour of my glasses, I started to think in positives, see the beauty and live the wonder, regardless of the external reality.
This switch in attitude helped every aspect of my business life too. When facing set-backs, if you just see them for what they are and then let them go so you can move on, your life is so much simpler.
Dealing with jealousy, depression and loneliness, were emotions that plagued me many times growing my business in the last ten years. By seeing them for what they are (false judgments I’d made and thus decided to see as real), letting them go and then moving back on focus towards what I wanted, has made the road to success a lot more smooth.
Business can be relatively easy when you just get out of your own way, learn some fundamentals about people and then put your head down and get stuff done. This is what I did during the last five years. I pushed myself to launch new projects, I learned what the key parts of my business are and what I should work to grow, and discovered my place in the business as it functions like a machine.
The result of this was the creation of three fantastic products, Blog Mastermind, Become A Blogger (in partnership with Gideon Shalwick, a great new friend and business partner I met in the last five years as well) and Membership Site Mastermind.
I owe a great deal of thanks to the pioneers in our industry. Without people like Jeff Walker, Mike Filsaime, Rich Schefren, John Reese, Frank Kern, Eben Pagan and countless others, who I learn a lot from by simply watching what they do, I wouldn’t have grown as an Internet marketer.
Seeing what is possible by watching others do it is incredibly powerful because it makes what might be possible become a reality. When you see someone do something and get a result, then you know that’s attainable as an outcome for you too. That’s why it’s critical to participate in your marketplace and find people you can model.
That, in many ways, is why this blog you are reading now is successful. That is very likely the reason why you have read this article up to this point. You know what is possible because I’ve done it. I’ve explained it right here in this article. You can model me, take parts of what I say and do and apply it to what you say and do.
The Journey Continues
If you go back to the very first blog post I made to this blog and read every word I have published up to today, you will take in almost five years of my life, five years that happen to be the most successful years of my life too.
The entries in this blog are reflective of the journey I’ve been on in my life, particularly my business life, which is why I named it the Entrepreneurs Journey. It’s a chronicle of what I’ve done, what I’m doing and what I’m thinking as I live it. It’s my experiences in written form.
More importantly though, this blog is a reflection of the key successes and failures I’ve had along the way. You can find the moment I learned how important it is to build an email list, the first time I used a squeeze page, how I launched my first product, my thoughts and experiments on profiting from a blog, how I bought and sold websites for profit, what I learned about the importance of my own thoughts as a key to success, my interviews with amazing people from around the world, and so much more.
Ultimately though, none of this really matters because it’s about what has been. What’s important to me, and just as important to you, is what you are doing and thinking right now and how you have changed as a person as a result of the path you have walked.
I hope as you have read any article in this blog at any point in time, if it has done nothing else, it has helped you to think and take actions that have lead you to become a better person, even if it was in just a tiny little way. I couldn’t ask for more than that.
…And of course, the journey continues, we’re not done yet!
Here’s to more adventures, success stories and even greater milestone achievements in the coming years.
Yaro Starak
Blogger
Wow wow wow… Yaro, I was feeling kind of depressed today, but your post just totally lifted my spirits.
For the last 3 years, I’ve gone through what you said you went through from 20 – 25 years old. I’m just dabbling around, trying stuff here and there, buying IM courses but took no action… I was LOST. Really lost.
But it’s only recently that I began to make real progress. And you are so right! It’s was only after I took action to experience and participate in the process by (guess what) starting my BLOG that I began to find real joy again. Just like you.
And then suddenly, within the space of like 3 weeks, I attracted some like-minded friends to work together with me on some internet marketing projects. It’s the Law of Attraction at work.
And now life is getting more exciting and enjoyable for me.
I’m now the stage where you are at 25 years old, your transition point. God willing, in 5 years time, I’ll be where you are today!
I will remember this post for a long long time. Thanks Yaro. You are a true inspiration to me.
Happy 30th birthday!
Yaro… I’m catching you in age… I’m 27 years old and “don’t have my shit together” as of yet but I’ve got a lot of great things in the makings.
Great article… I just recently found your website and have already bookmarked it. You’ve definitely made a great name and website.
I wish you much success.
Blake
yaro you are fantastic and it is a pity that over one year i have been trying to register for your coaching but you refuse to help out. and i will like to know why ???????? thanks
Hi Yaro,
I just started blogging back in Dec of 08 I am a graduate student of Alex Jeffreys first class. I did not know very much about the internet other than running my successful ebay business. Through Alex’s mentorship program I have learned alot . This post makes me reflect on how far I have come and where I want to go. Thanks for all you do to keep us motivated . I am also very excited about becoming a member of your Become A Blogger Premium site. I am so looking forward to completing these videos. keep doing what you do. you are truly Inspirational to us all.
Hi Yaro
Belated Birthday Greetings from across the Pond.
The year you were born 1979 – was the year I started my first business!
14+ discovered GIRLS – had a ball!
20+ got married the first time
30+ got divorced – then married again (much better 2nd time round!)
40+ started to get worried!
50+ Don’t Go There!!
Hope You had a Good Day (excuse the Aussie pun!)
Your Blog posts are always good because you have a great flow to your writing(LOL)
regards
Graham in UK
Belated Happy Birthday, Yaro,
You’ve done alot in 30 years. You are, however, almost young enough to be my great-grandson. My granddaughter is almost 41. So, in my 85 orbits around the sun (I like this expression better than that I am so and so years old), I’ve had many experiences also. Now I am starting, hopefully, a new one, making money from a blog. So far not too successful, partly because I haven’t been working at it hard enough. But, down the road, who knows. At any rate, your suggestions are extremely helpful; now I just have to implement them.
Well, better late than never; happy birthday Yaro! The next 30 year journey will be as exciting as the first, with a lot of new challenges. Keep up the good spirit and it will be a ball!! Best regards Robbert
Yaro,
You are surely at an amazing place in your life!
Happy birthday and may I still be one of your readers on the day of your 35th, 40th, 45th and 50th (and beyond) birthday!
Krizia
Belated birthday wishes to you!
Your Message
Heck Yaro! I’m old enough to be your grandfather, even so, I am learning so much from you. Looks like a lot of others are too.
Many Happy Returns and best wished for the rest of your Journey.
Geoff
Happy Birthday! It’s amazing how what you explained you were going through in the early twenties is what I feel now (I’m 20). Very difficult of times, but persevere and get yourself through the tough times. Amazing post and hope all goes well. Cheers, mate!
First of all happy birthday! Great to know that we share the same horoscope! Really long post but very interesting. I like it when you explain your past experience, especially before you reached 25 years old. Somewhere in your explanations, I could see myself….Yes you need to have that positive thinking to see the world another way….
Happy Birthday, Yaro.
I turned 61 on the same day. 19th, right?
Nice post.
john
Happy belated Birthday Yaro! As someone who recently turned 30, this post was very interesting to me. I truely enjoyed it.
Cheers!
Maria
I find myself in the 20-25 age when spend a lot of time playing with different projects hope to gain experience in something and set my path as well.
Happy birthday !
Happy birthday! I wish I had been as far along in my “journey” when I was 30 y.o.
I enjoyed reading your post. I am turning thirty my-self here pretty soon. Keep up the great work!
Your Message
M
Happy Birthday, Yaro, and many more years of great adventure and success in all your endeavors. I’m a newbie at blogging, actually, haven’t written anything yet other than my personal journals. I am reading all emails and training videos from you and Gideon that I subscribe to. Working on finding my “passion,” (and I’m more than twice your age). I really like your premise of the “colored glasses” way of seeing the world. It’s sometimes hard to maintain that paradigm shift, but I’m starting to think in positives, and see the possibilities. Thanks to you, with this new mindset I hope to expand my capabilities and vision for my present and future. Again, Happy Birthday!
Happy be-lated birthday to you. You have been an inspiration to me. I am still learning and is about implementing some of the things you have been saying.
You will always be a success as you are always helping others to succeed. Enjoy more successful years.
Your Message
Greetings Yaro,
Thank You for the words of wisdom you have shared. You have passed life’s initiation with flying colors into becoming a real adult. The one big lesson in life is that the 20′s kick ass from 20 to 29 for everyone. Now the 30′s is about assessment time about what you want to do and become. The 40′s is fine tuning time. Look at your life and put value on what’s important and what is not. The 50′s is about getting a new lease on life. What you really want to do and now being able to do it and enjoy every minute of it. From 60 on its about living each day to its fullest because you have earned it.
Here” to 30 + 30+ 30 and then some of many enjoyable birthdays
Njideka “Queen of StressFree Living” Olatunde
Yaro, thanks for this post…I caught it the other day, and it effected me and here is what I wrote….
” Yaro has been one of the very few who I go back to and see what he is doing in the world of blogging. I cannot afford to take his courses any longer, but I go back constantly to past lessons, and to his blog for new insights and new inspirations.
I find it amazing that at 30 years young, Yaro has accomplished so much, and in his accomplishments and through his journeys, that he has shared with us, we have been able to grow also, while following the path that he has laid out for us to follow, thus creating our own successful paths, while continuing the journey with him.
Thanks Yaro ”
Yaro, I turn 52 tomorrow, and I am still on the journey of discovery as far as being an entrepreneur and of course you are still a great influence in that journey.
Hey there Yaro..
I’m one of your subscribers to your newsletter…
When I heard how you would be turning 30 I thought I would have to come read your post.
You’ve had one great Journey my friend..!!
But you’ve only just turned 30…
Well done …both for your age and your experience…
Now you are recalling your journey in hindsight .. And you still have your life in front of you … imagine what you can achieve …
I am a student of Alex Jeffreys and also Dean holland …
I am just starting my Journey !!
And I do not have any experience my friend … not the kind that you describe …
But I am hoping that I will start to gain experience and success at my age…
through the coaching I am receiving…
and after reading your post…this has given me more hope for the future.
I cordially invite you to visit my blog as a guest poster.
Malcolm.t.Mckinnell.
I am ( 67yrs young )
WAY to go Malcolm….LOVE THAT ATTITUDE. !!!!!
Great site too. !!!
Tasha
Happy (belated) Birthday Yaro!
Belated Happy Birthday Wishes to you Yaro!
Thanks for the great blog. I am 59 and have used your bueprint and much of the blog tips this year. I wish you many many more productive and happy birthdays to come.
May all Bhudda bless you for your success and happiness.
You always make a great post.
Your newsletter help me a lot,even I’m still the same as the beginner.
Thanks your your contributions.
To a fellow Aussie and Cancerian – A belated Happy Birthday Yaro!
Its certainly a milestone/threshold year. And thank you for your honesty, candor in the above post. It really helps to read this, to feel less alone in this journey of life.
You have managed to summarize so much in that one article, than many have tried in entire blogs ! You are down to earth, open, welcoming – you interact and relate well. You are ‘real’ and that’s why so many people love/like you Yaro … Keep on at it!
As with other great comments above – my little input! Am just contending with the transformation to my 40th year (on the 22nd July) -eek – I’m a ‘moon baby’ – 40th anniversary! – and just found a badge on my dressing table, with the words – “Just turned 30-Aaaah!’, after finding your post here- lol – 10 years ago, wow.
But I am feeling comfortable with this now, drinking a cuppa, eating some rather rich, indulgent halva(!), and looking forward to my 40s – and its great to know you are 30 now and not in your very young 20s – hehe!
But as you know/state, life is a journey – age helps, our learning, experiences – there is never an ‘arrival’ of sorts, just lots of little ‘arrivals’. We often take our lives for granted, especially when feeling happy, safe …. so despite your unusual self-awareness, wisdom for your years, please remember – change is a certainty – whether its for better or for worse
My teens were the worst – lost – but I needed to be ‘lost’, like you suggest, to move on and forwards!. I can relate to much of what you say about your early 20s, the less happier times.
The 2nd half of my 20s were also probably the best of my life to date – I was a high-achiever, defined myself by what I did, how well I did, perfectionism, completing my BA, Masters Degree and PhD – moving on from Academia to Senior Position in Govt – I ‘had it all’ – the future, the partner … I was ambitious and at ‘peace’ relatively for the first time ….
Not suspecting that it would change so dramatically and how hard it would be in such a short time, despite my ‘supposed’ awareness of life, mindset. Just before I turned 30 my life changed due to an incurable illness, an illness that hits people in their prime years, their 20s to 30s.
Things can change in an instant. This quote reflects events/life quite well, although slightly depressing (sorry):
- ‘It is often a crisis event that shatters the illusions that anchor our lives”
Its relatively easy to have ‘happy glasses’ when life is good; very easy to have ‘sad glasses’ when life sucks! But as long as we are ‘aware’ of this – then we can get through each of these times – the changes…
I also like Barbara Fox’s comment above – that we should define ourselves by who we ‘are’, not by what we ‘do’ – especially since I lost all that I had when illness struck – unpredictable, my entire lifestyle, security, happiness was gone – and it has taken nearly my entire 30s, or 2nd half of this decade to deal with this. Still managing, trying to cope with illness – and coming out the other side, knowing who ‘I’ am, and not feeling hopeless because I am no longer what I ‘do’ or ‘did’.
I am now at a place again, where I am re-acquainting myself with myself – and as someone also said (in their 60s!) to not only wonder – ‘what do I want to be when I grow up’ – but to also ‘participate’ in life again – its both scary and exciting
I just mention this because 1. I am so very happy that you are happy, 2. You really are very self-aware, wise for your years, but 3. please remember, enjoy, but never take anything for granted … I don’t think you do this though.
Define yourself by who ‘you’ are, self-awareness, and not by what you ‘do’ – because if you lose what you ‘do’, as I did, then you have ‘you’ to fall back on!
We go forwards, backwards, forwards and onwards! I never wanted to (or thought I would) digress back to a ‘sad glasses’ mindset, but it happened – it may happen again, but at least we grow each time through the ups and the downs….
Your life, your views will continue to change – and with your insight, I am sure you will get through them all. If ever in doubt, just come back here and read your post and the comments
You have been a great inspiration for me over the last few years – for many people – as I have watched you grow.
Congratulations Yaro – on your journey so far, your achievements, your wisdom and all the best for your future journies! Hoping that change, the future chapters in your life, will continue in a positive direction always !
There is so much to look forward too
Happy Birthday (a little bit late!). Turning 30 was pretty tough for me, but I agree with what you said- by your late 20′s you finally have your “stuff” together. The 30′s are going to be the best time of your life! Enjoy!
Thank you Yaro. I just turn 30 myself and with your help i am getting my”shit” togather! thank you very much for every thing oh and happy late birthday!
One of the biggest things I have realized while becoming comfortable with myself is everyone feels like everyone else has their act together. That could be further from the truth. I have noticed by asking several successful people in different businesses, friends, and colleagues that they too also feel not good enough, or their work is not respected by others. I believe that once you get over the fact that you will never be liked and accepted by everyone and allow yourself to be the real you is when you will be able to truly live the life you want. Life is too short to be miserable and worrying constantly about what others think about you and how you are.
Happy Birthday (a little bit late!).
Yaro,
Happy Belated Birthday Yaro! I’m sorry I’m so late to your party. But our party here is an everyday event right?
Thank you so much for sharing of where you’ve been and where you’re going. It was not only informative but also inspirational. You’re a real genuine guy. Just like your mentors you mention. Thanks for helping us out. Thanks for showing us the way to get our shit together.
Rey
…Happy b-lated BDay…
i’m getting close to 40, at this stage i’m just happy i’ve made it this far:)
Remember: Success is watever makes u happy
Happy belated birthday, Yaro, and welcome to the 30′s!
I understand exactly what you’re saying – I turned 30 last year, and you really do start reflecting on your life, accomplishments, and your goals for the future!
“Mindset is, and always will be, the key to everything” – So true mate- Happy Birthday! when you coming down to NZ to visit? Happy to show you around
Paul
Happy Birthday (a little bit late!).
Happy Belated Birthday… my inbox was inundated with hundreds of emails… yikkk
Anyway, I really enjoyed reading your journey, thank you so much for sharing.
Happy Belated Birthday Yaro!
Finally read this post as your recommendation in your Blog Mastermind course in preparation for my new blog.
It hit me when reading your story, we all have a story to tell. Seems to me you may have benefited from writing this even more than your readers
Continue to live with passion and make a difference in peoples lives. You clearly have a gift for doing that!
By the way, enjoy your 30′s, they go by fast!!
Wishing you well,
Bob
Belated Happy Birthday Yaro!
Happy Birthday late! Now you can watch that show 30 something and understand it! yeah there’s no need to rush off and gte married or anything like that, heck you could wait till your 40 or older before you get married as long as you are ok with yourself.
Cheers Mate!
Happy Birthday Yaro, Belated.
Hey do you think you may be coming to California anytime? if so I want to take you to Disneyland.
And the San Diego Zoo.
and Seaworld
and the Wild Animal Park.
Seriously. Otherwise I am coming there with ym wife adn little girl and I would like to meet you sometime. Because I am going to be making more money soon thanks to you!!!
Thanks Yaro.
Larry C.
Old post, just read it. 30+ is the wisdom age. Belated one!
Hey Yaro,
First things first, a very happy belated birthday Yaro. I enjoyed reading your life experiences with you age. And I am glad that you are succeeding now, its great to see. I believe that you have to be worthy in your eyes only then you can prove the world that you are worthy.
Belated Happy Birthday Yaro! I’ve been munching on your articles and posts the past three days and am learning a lot. You said to look for someone to model and I’ve chosen you as my virtual mentor
Seems like the down under is full of great internet geniuses these days- Andrew & Daryl Grant, Darren Rosen and Yaro Starak!
Anyhow, blessings to you and hope to hear more of your work. Will join as a PAID member one of your sites soon.
Yaro, I just started following your blog and could not imagine a more relevant post. I’m at what I hope is the beginning of a similar journey and nothing is more valuable then hearing advice from someone who’s been there. Thanks bro.
Mike
Great reflection and Happy Birthday, Yaro! Your blogs are truly inspiring and life-changing. Yes, your blog is full of wisdom. I will be reading your blogs as often as I can.
Hey Yaro,
Thank you for sharing your “life” journey. It’s educated and inspired me.. It’s given me lots of ideas on my next Action Step in becoming an internet marketer and more importantly having Clarity in who I’m supposed to be and what I’m supposed to do.
This is now a resource that I can continuously refer to for more ideas, inspirations, and how to’s on living an exceptional life.
Thanks again,
Chung Tang
Halifax, Nova Scotia
Just finished reading all those pages on here of your personal journey. Really amazing! Thanks for sharing it. I’m trying some similar things but so far perhaps am only at your entry level frustrations. Will keep plugging at it though.
God’s best to you,
bloggerdaddy.ca
Great story thanks for sharing it, new bloggers sometimes get a bit down after a while because they do not seem to be getting any results from their blog, I hope that they can just keep reading stories like this and never quit, success may be just around the corner.